When You Feel Like Giving Up

I am nothing close to the queen of positive thinking. I leave that honour to a few close friends of mine. I am easily frustrated, flustered, and cranky. However, in my life, I have realized that very few things comes easily to me, and I have to work hard to learn things, understand things, and excel at things. So, I generally handle struggles and failure okay.

Except when it comes to crochet…crochet has been easy for me for as long as I can remember. I learned it quickly, I learn, and develop, new techniques in a blink of an eye. I can create patterns from things I visualize. I can make substitutions, resize projects, and find shortcuts like nobody’s business.

So, when I find a project that I can’t do…something I get stuck on…something I struggle with…when it comes to crochet, I lose it. I get frustrated, angry, feel terribly about myself, and I cry. Oh man do I cry. I am ready to totally give up, the project, the style, and at times, even crochet. I am fortunate that this doesn’t happen often…otherwise I am quite sure that my husband would have left me years ago.

I very recently had a project like this. A couple of friends asked me to make them something (and no, I won’t tell you what it is until I am done and can show you!), and I took one look, said, psshhhh piece of cake, sure! I purchased the pattern and got to work. The first few items I made for it, too easy, boring…made me wonder why I paid for a pattern. Then…I hit an oil slick, fast, hard, and unbalanced. I hit a point where I understood nothing the pattern was saying. The stitches made sense, but my numbers were not working out, not to save my life. I must have “completed” the round and frogged it 15 times…at the very least. I spent two days staring at this thing, debating emailing the pattern writer to ask for help. I even put down the crochet for an entire day and said, forget this, I’ll tell them it is too hard and I can’t do it. I was so over it, the project, the pattern, the entire concept of yarn.

I mean, look at this mess! It looks terrible!


Then, after the 3rd day of trying to figure out this part of the pattern, I had decided to frog the entire thing, instead of just the one round. I had to have messed up in the beginning because there was no way I was screwing up a pattern that seemed this easy.

So, I started over…and actually got even more frustrated as I went. I realized that I had not made a mistake in the beginning, I was just really struggling and not understanding that round.

But, I actually thought of a friend of mine…who always says to me, “change your inner monologue.” Every time I am down and out, that is her response. “Tell me 3 things you love about yourself.” I knew that I couldn’t log onto Facebook and just cry about what I failure I am and how I was giving up…at least, not without a lecture and having to try to think of things I like about myself.

So…I looked at the pattern, the stitch count, and the arrangement…and all of sudden, it just made sense…click…I can’t even explain it. I now look at it and can’t even figure out how I was screwing it up…or why. It just seems so easy. and now, I am about 2/3 of the way done with it, and it is look fantastic. 🙂


So, moral of the story,  don’t give up when something is hard. Change your inner monologue and look at it from a new angle. Because sometimes, it is the silliest things that trip you up, and once you realize that, everything falls into place.


One thought on “When You Feel Like Giving Up

  1. Pingback: Elephant Pillow – Pattern Review | SweetBabyDesi

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